Hello Bloggies! First, an apology. I know you've been sitting at your laptops/smart phones/tablets with confused expressions on your faces. I know you've been distressed and inwardly crying out 'Where is the next blog? When is it coming?!' I know you've been dying for a tweet, a word, anything in the name of breaking social boundaries, general nerdiness *salute* or even just a weird gross joke or two. From the bottom of my heart, I apologise. I've spent 10 days in a field at a christian MUSIC festival and have not had access to you all. Sad times. However, camping brings out in me a whole new level of disgusting that I never knew I had, so prepare yourselves for many a blog that will leave you saying 'Seriously? She posted that on the internet?!' Good times.
So, grovelling out of the way, I thought, as part repentance, part gift to you, I would share with you the BEST IDEA IN THE HISTORY OF HUMAN KIND! Ok, maybe I'm getting ahead of myself, but I was quite pleased with my little discovery. As I may have mentioned/ranted before, I have this thing called POBS (or IBS to those of you who want beating with a large stick up a personal place) and the thing about POBS is you spend a lot of time on the loo; 'waiting on the Lord' as it were, or, to put it more crudely, waiting to poo.
So, enough sharing for one day...before I left for my christian MUSIC festival, I was sitting in the kitchen, with a cup of tea at that just beautiful temperature of hot, but drinkable, when I realised another round of 'waiting on the lord' was about to grace my life. Without thinking, I picked up my tea and started heading for the bathroom, when Jake asked, somewhat increduously 'Are you taking your tea to the loo with you?' I paused. I reflected. And said 'Yes. Yes I am.' What followed was perhaps the greatest thing of all time (apart from Jesus, Jane Austen, Batman, Star Wars and the Princess Bride...and cake) Ready? Well you should be because I've pretty much mentioned it already:
Tea on the Toilet
Now some of you are thinking 'What's the point?' and others are possibly thinking 'Well, of course! We've been doing that for years.' To the first group, answers are coming. To the second, well done. I salute you sir and/or madam. You have reached the promised land.
The reason why Tea Toilet Time is a beautiful, wise and wonderful thing, or at least, one reason of many, is time. More and more we are becoming these crazy busy people with responsibilities, worries and general stuff *salutes* to do. There's no time anymore to just sit and think, relax, breathe in a bit of life. Even when we have down time we're watching TV, listening to ITunes, reading a book, there're no little moments of calm nothingness, to simply be. Tea on the Toilet cuts through the madness because it gives you a quiet time without having to, if you'll pardon the pun, force it. Even if you don't have POBS, there are always those occasions where you know you're going to need the loo, but there'll be a long time waiting before anything occurs. Instead of leaving it until nature not only calls but texts, facebooks and starts banging down the front door, put the kettle on. Make a brew and have a sit until nature is ready to take its course. It even solves that awkward problem of 'Is there more coming or should I get up?' Who cares? Sit back and take another sip.
P.S. This blog is dedicated to my friend 'Hannah' as this may literally be the only way to make her stop. I've possibly saved her life now. I'm brilliant.
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